Halloween is only two and a half weeks away, so I feel the need to talk about an important issue: couples costumes. They are a blight on this sacred holiday. Ironic couples costumes can work. I had a friend who once dressed up as a bloody Roy and with his girlfriend as a white tiger, which was hilariously inappropriate and therefore acceptable.

But "cute" couples costumes just make people hate you. Nobody wants to see you wear matching knit sweaters, why would they want to see you dressed as a Hershey Hug and Kiss? Before you hit up the Halloween stores, you might want to take a look at these atrocities:

I can't really grasp the subtext on this one...

This is the worst thing anyone has ever done, ever. At least they will never have to wait in a bathroom line. Am I right or am I right?